Gift Horse Dentistry

Finally, all the humans are dead

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 21:43:34 -0400

Finally, all the humans are dead

Let slip the thongs of war

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 16:51:01 -0400

Let slip the thongs of war

tastefullyoffensive: [philintheblanks] That’s pretty...

Mon, 17 Jun 2013 16:49:19 -0400

tastefullyoffensive:

[philintheblanks]

That’s pretty much how it works, yes.

No one even questions the shit I do for a living anymore, and...

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 16:49:45 -0400

No one even questions the shit I do for a living anymore, and that’s what worries me most of all.

She’s bright and you’re bleak…

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 16:41:25 -0400

She’s bright and you’re bleak…

gregrutter: randyliedtke: I spent 2 months and $100 planning...

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 10:00:16 -0400

gregrutter:

randyliedtke:

I spent 2 months and $100 planning this

Worth every penny

Hey, it’s your asshole neighbor. You know what time it is? Motorcycle time. Don’t say...

Sat, 15 Jun 2013 06:32:00 -0400

Hey, it’s your asshole neighbor. You know what time it is? Motorcycle time. Don’t say 6am, that would be incorrect.

So you’re cool if I just rev this mean little puppy in the driveway for a while, right? No need to answer, I know you’re sleeping. That was a joke. No earthly creature could sleep through the racket I’m making. That’s why I bought this motorcycle. A little present from me, to me, on the eve of my mid-life crisis that sends the message: If I had to pick five words to describe me, “inconsiderate” would be eight of them. I took three extra words because I’m really, very inconsiderate.

Now that you’re up I think it’s high time I went back inside and pretended I did nothing wrong. Let’s do this again soon.

Vroom vroom,

Your asshole neighbor

jetblacktothecenter: suicidewatch: The Replacements “Can’t...

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 23:38:43 -0400

jetblacktothecenter:

suicidewatch:

The Replacements “Can’t Hardly Wait” (Tim Version)

HOWEVER, i am enjoying everyone posting the replacements in celebration. keep that up.

I don’t live near any of the Riotfest dates and definitely don’t have money to go to them, but I’m happy for everyone who is.

So as of now I think I’ll be moving to Queens in September. Equal parts excited and terrified...

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 23:08:49 -0400

So as of now I think I’ll be moving to Queens in September.

Equal parts excited and terrified of the possibility of starving to death but mostly excited.

Red Medicine is now old enough to vote.

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 10:00:24 -0400

Red Medicine is now old enough to vote.

celesteual-healing: okay is it weird that dave davidson’s voice...

Wed, 12 Jun 2013 04:15:46 -0400

celesteual-healing:

okay is it weird that dave davidson’s voice immediately stopped matching his face as soon as he cut off his beard?

he’s cute under there though haha

The top comment is “Shave Shavison”

Beat me to it

digg: diggvideos: Dogs vs. citrus It’s impossible not to...

Tue, 11 Jun 2013 12:37:44 -0400

digg:

diggvideos:

Dogs vs. citrus

It’s impossible not to smile as you watch this.

Harlan Ellison’s typewriter I am an artist and should be...

Tue, 11 Jun 2013 07:25:00 -0400

Harlan Ellison’s typewriter

I am an artist and should be exempt from shit

moon-cunt: get outta here - cheeky Mommy didn’t let you play...

Tue, 11 Jun 2013 04:26:57 -0400

moon-cunt:

get outta here - cheeky

Mommy didn’t let you play football

so now you think you’ve got something to prove.

You bring all your dude-bros to the show

and cover all my friends with booze.

Get outta here.

Leave me alone.

I don’t wanna see your macho moves.

You ain’t in the band so stop grabbing the mic.

Do us all a favor and get out of here.

You sucked all the fun out of my night.

Get outta here.

Leave me alone.

Into this

suburbantragic: Due to a series of stupid events, I am in possession of a sizable vile of mid-grade...

Tue, 11 Jun 2013 01:55:36 -0400

suburbantragic:

Due to a series of stupid events, I am in possession of a sizable vile of mid-grade salvia and I want nothing to do with it.

AGAIN?!

WHO KEEPS GIVING YOU SALVIA MARC

bobbyfinger: laughingsquid: ‘Grumpy Cat: A Grumpy Book’...

Mon, 10 Jun 2013 17:48:16 -0400

bobbyfinger:

laughingsquid:

‘Grumpy Cat: A Grumpy Book’ Celebrates the Grouch in Everyone

What are “disgruntled tips and activities”?

It’s real literature, Bobby, you wouldn’t understand

iandsharman: “Why were you late in today?” “Oh, I got tied up...

Mon, 10 Jun 2013 15:27:25 -0400

iandsharman:

“Why were you late in today?”

“Oh, I got tied up on the subway…”

suburbantragic: AMC’s playing The Mummy twice and The Mummy Returns once this week, so they’re...

Sun, 09 Jun 2013 23:52:24 -0400

suburbantragic:

AMC’s playing The Mummy twice and The Mummy Returns once this week, so they’re billing it as The Mummy Week. For that kind of title, I expect for them to play The Mummy nonstop all week. No commercials, just Brendan Fraser. I refuse to let this gross perversion of justice stand.

Let’s take a moment to remember that Monkeybone was a movie that happened.

Ok.

Now we can continue to mourn this non-Mummy Week “Mummy Week”

"It’s not easy being drunk all the time. If it were easy everyone would do it."

Sun, 09 Jun 2013 21:41:07 -0400

“It’s not easy being drunk all the time. If it were easy everyone would do it.”

- Tyrion’s killing it tonight

"I stayed in bed for over an hour looked at things on my phone I felt slightly anxious about..."

Sat, 08 Jun 2013 16:39:29 -0400

“

I stayed in bed for over an hour
looked at things on my phone
I felt slightly anxious about nothing particular
I walked downstairs and poured coffee into a jar
I asked a person on the internet if I should take drugs
I took drugs before the person had time to respond

I feel alienated by people who express concern about me without
defining their concern in terms of a specific solution or goal
I dont feel comforted by the idea of an afterlife
I dont want to continue experiencing things after I die
I want someone to pull my hair because I like the idea of someone
controlling my head without touching my head

what is the difference between being an independent person
and being a person who is accepting of loneliness

”

- “Today My Alarm Went Off at 12:30 p.m.,” Mira Gonzalez (via bonirl)